My daughter's silence

Mother what is not in doubt, anxiety and panic to see her son who are increasingly turned into a figure very quiet child. Maybe at first look normal, because a child growing up will definitely experience times people say times "troubled". But it is not only worried me even I am grateful because  daughter now turned into a princess gentler and more shut himself by beginning to use the clothes are taught in Islam.
It all started when one day I saw my daughter quietly and alone in the room, even when I asked her to leave the house he or she always refused on the grounds that it is assured "Sorry bun, I was working on task", suddenly I do not dare to disturb my daughter who indeed is reading a book. By nightfall I reminded her and invited her to dinner
"Son, mother've made your favorite soup, let's eat first with the same father ..." Ask me to him
"Sorry, mother same father ate first course, later the Princess catch up ya bun" he replied in a tone that was very lethargic.
"Loh ... child mother why? lethargic once? ... "I asked worried,
"No bun, I'm fine ...." And he said, while giving a smile that convinced me.
And finally I left my daughter who is currently busy with a laptop in front of him. Initially I trust and believe that this is indeed the daughter okay, maybe this time he does need to be alone and make calmhimself.
Every day I'm getting confused with the attitude of my daughter who became a recluse. Usually when he went to college he was always a lot of exchange of views with his father at the dinner table, now he was always quiet and does not talk much, usually even he is always telling us things and activities he did in college, but this time he did not tell what any college or any of the activities which he did. Again - again I think that my daughter is indeed in a state that is fine and if there is a problem it will certainly tell me or his father.
Until one night around 02:30 when I want to run tahajudku worship, I saw my daughter being ablutions, indeed when I deliberately did not reprimand him and just see it from my bedroom door. Hearts happy and very grateful because God has changed and opened my heart to be able to practice tahajud at night. I continued to run tahajud worship me, when I finish tahajudku I decided to see my daughter again whether she continues her or not. Subhanallah heart rages see my daughter praying in tears and sobs. Yes God is now my belief collapsed see  daughter crying with sobs, it turns out I was wrong this time my daughter was having problems, O God where the mother bear to see her daughter prayed as she shed tears with crying that is so heartbreaking. I am sad, very sad to see my daughter's carefree daughter is now a silent even cover all that happened to her.

the day when my daughter will go to college I tried to ask what was happening to him

"Daughter, Mother would ask the daughter ..." I asked him, but my daughter is only turned with a look that seemed empty and confused

"What daughter alright?" I asked again, he looked at me with a puzzled look and a little longer to answer my question

"I'm fine bun", he replied with a smile a rather sluggish. "If there is anything the princess always a story to the mother or the father, why now plasticity ga ever tell you?" I asked again.

"Because there's nothing to me to tell bun" replied with a smile, then she quickly stood up and said goodbye to go to college. The more wonder and increasingly concerned with my daughter, who changed his attitude made me feel more and more confused by what was happening to him.

When I was tidying his room I saw a little book open on the table to learn my daughter, in which there are writings and looks a little water spots whether it's water that comes out of nowhere, I tried to read the contents of the text.

Dear Diary ...

Already 1 week I try not to be for police, I'm great right ..., although there were frequent cries every day. It is also a day to 65 I did not communicate with him, even he was not at all in touch. This time I will continue to try to avoid and not to stay away and cut ties silahturahmi, but I want to slightly reduce the pain in my heart, I did not want to continue to be a burden for him. Right now I see she is so happy with her new life without me, and here I try to re-widen the smile and try to forget what happened. I'm sure I could handle everything myself because I know God is always with me, and Allah will not give a trial in the limits of the servants ......... ..

Diary, in fact I miss her, but somehow she missed me or not. Is she still remembers the words that I always say that "I'm afraid to lose you" he would still remember what happened, he would still remember all the promises he never said and never I say. Until now I still keep well everything, but there was nothing else I could do but pray and complained to God, praying that there he could be a better person and more responsible. I promised here I'll learn to be a better woman again. I'm sure I could and strong cover all of it from someone else, I promise .....

Reading all this makes me more and more irregular, daughter being experienced periods of teenagers known as upset, but why is times like this what makes it like this?, Mothers which was anxious to see his son become like this? What the truth is hidden? , What actually happened to my daughter ??.
"O Allah, give guidence, what actually happen. Do not you let my daughter linger saddened by the circumstances that occurred at this time, O God ... "I said to myself.
think in my mind to buy a new shirt that might be able to make my daughter a little bit happy, I quickly go to a regular store that I go along with the manjaku daughter.
When my daughter got home, I rushed give it to her shirt.
"Assalamu'alaikum .." the daughter said as he entered the house.
"Wa'alaikumsalam .... His daughter's mother had gone home yes ... "I said, clutching the daughter's body, it wants to shed tears really wanted to ask what he was experiencing at this time that I could not feel the happiness that usually always he has shown.
"Daughter, mother had something to Princess" I said, showing my parcel clothes that are bought in advance.
"What's bun ...? "Tanya's daughter to me, as he opened the parcel.
"Whoa ... nice bun, I like .. Thank mom .." He said as he hugged me.
"Equally dear ... If there are any stories of daughter to mother, the daughter of a story already familiar to the mother or the father. Whatever daughter wanted while his father and mother were able, God willing, will be fulfilled dear .. "I said, hugging him back.
"Mother of calm, the daughter is now fine bun, daughter just takes time. Daughter dear mother and father "He said with a tone that is so sluggish. I ventured to ask too deep on my daughter, I try to find the right time.
I'm trying to be patient and pray, let daughter like this, I just wanted to see if there are other changes that happened to my daughter. Every day I always take my daughter, the day I increasingly feel that the daughter manjaku increasingly become someone who is covered and reserved. Nothing should he tell me after classes as usual. Return to college back in silence in the room, who knows what is usually done by him.
One day when my daughter back to college, I saw her cry, without greeting the time of entry into the house, he passed into the room and locked it from the inside. I tried to knock on her door, but she did not give an answer. The more upset this careful, sicker see my daughter now always be the daughter of gloom and unceasing. I can not stand watching my daughter to be like this, I decided to talk slowly. When night I saw my daughter's room door was closed and locked, I was worried because my daughter had not eaten since the previous lecture return
"Dear daughter, son open the door, get out here boy" I said, knocking on his door was locked, but there is absolutely no answer from within
"Putri..Bunda want to go dear .." I said back
"Sorry bun, like his own daughter first" was the reply from inside the room.
"But the daughter had not eaten from home the previous lecture, let my son get out .." Again, my words were ignored by him
"Women do not pity ya same mother ...?" I asked back, still standing in front of my daughter's room locked.
"Forgive me mother, but really I want time alone bun" he replied with sobs I heard from outside. There's nothing I can do but wait for him to come out from the room, I'm not used to scold and force this manjaku daughter.
"Well .. If you call mother daughter ah yes dear" I said back.
I was waiting for a call from my daughter's lips, but never heard. 2 to 3 hours I waited for the right call never heard that call. Increasingly worried and restless heart is, concerned with the daughter

"Mother looked nervous at all?" Asked my husband
"Mother concerned about the well's daughter, mother daughter afraid .."
"Mother istigfar, God willing, our daughter was fine, currently does he need his own bun, later certainly brightened again .." replied my husband tried to calm my mind.
I tried to calm myself by laying down and closed my eyes and intend to 1/3 turn my night to beg and ask for help to God. I devote all my heart, my worries on my daughter, my daughter child anxiety. Swift stream of tears, can not afford to see my daughter now turned into silent just like that, what actually happened, I do not usually see my daughter in a sad during this time. When the end I prayed, I heard the sound of crying and yes ... I'm sure it was the sound of crying daughter. I rushed towards my daughter's room. Arriving in my daughter's room, I saw he was crying on the prayer rug wonderful it was, my heart could not bear to hear the cries of those days, do what he felt at this time moved on me, so I felt that what he experienced.
"Mother ..." says my daughter and immediately hugged me tightly.
"Mother forgive Princess, Princess do not intend to make the mother and father worried, Princess one bun ..." He said, crying and tightened his embrace. Unable to my heart to see my daughter cry, where the mother bear to see her cry panting hug. Slowly I tried to ask him what really happened.
"Daughter ... Mother would not force the daughter to answer any questions the mother, the mother was worried because the late Princess changed. Mother was always cheerful child, if there is a problem no matter how small is always a story to the mother or the father. But lately daughter so quiet, and seemed even trying to hide something. "I said as I wiped the tears in her cheeks.
"Mother forgive Princess, daughter of the same one many mothers. sorrymother daughter ... "Tears my son back.
"Women not wrong dear ... .. Anyway if the daughter of one, the mother will always forgive dear daughter. Now try to mother daughter story, why daughter like this? What mother or father no wrong at daughter? "I asked back.
My daughter just kept crying and trying to get the words out of his mouth and tried to stifle a sob.
"Mother ..., if you know it will be like a princess, the daughter does not want to take a step like this bun ..." The voice that came from his lips as he continued to hold back the sobs.
"I mean what kid Princess? Mother still do not understand you mean .. "I asked that they lay with words that my daughter said.
"Princess upset mom ..." He answered with cries of increasingly sob.
Whether I should laugh or sad to see the answer to this son. I tried hugged him tightly and tried to give him enter.
"Unfortunately ... it was reasonable troubled by the mother. Because you're a teenager, you too are heading towards adulthood times tables. Children's mother had a great turn out .. "I said, smiling and wiping the tears falling on my daughter's cheek.

"But I'm upset acute mom .." He said again.
"Yes you acute confusion, it's been months you're like this. Until the mother confused what to do ". My daughter was silent and still crying.
"Princess .. first mother also never really experienced what natural daughter today. But the mother does not go on in sadness. First father and mother did not "going out" the rich are now more trend "LDR" same .father just mother just friends, friends who remind each other. But when the mother knows that the father had to be educated in the neighboring country, the mother felt sad all. Mother thought it was only mother who feels sad, it turned out the father was also sad to be friends remotely with the mother ".
"Loh where the mother knows that the father also sad?" Asked my daughter.
"Naah that he, first time father moved to the neighboring country. At the mother's father did not touch even communication. But mother always prayed there father was given the safety and protection given by God. When the mother miss the same father, mother just pray and confide to God. Initially the mother just felt that the father and mother was just a casual friend, but the longer the mother really felt strange so. Finally the mother realized that somehow God entrusts to your father's feelings. But again the mother just pray and surrender, because the mother does not know how your father at the time. Maybe dad already had close friends there. Or maybe your father already has a wonderful plan there. Mother kept forward of the mother, the mother must stay focused with lectures mother. Although sad but should still run it the mother of the mother and should not give up just because the feeling that the natural mother. But after seven years of separation, God finally brought us together without planned. When the mother was out with friends the foundation for the social event. Suddenly there was a man who called the mother of the back she said that if there is a friend who wants to meet with the mother. Mother suddenly surprised that wants to meet with the mother that your father put. At that time the mother can not speak. Mother was silent with his eyes teary, mothers do not think it turned out diacara baksos that mothers can go back to your father tertemu son. At that time the feeling that mothers withhold reappear the next time you see a father present in front of the mother. The more the relationship and communication father and mother the better, until one day your father took mother walks with friends the other and when it was the father says "Anna Uhibukki fillah" to the mother in front of all the other friends. Mother sad then, is whether the results of prayer that the mother received so far. It kah path of God's love? This kah mate that God gave to the mother?. With bold and pure intention, father and grandfather grandmother came to the house of the elderly mother to woo mothers. When the mother was surprised and still confused as to what the true and real that when this happens. Until finally the mother and father are united in the knot. That was honey, God always hears the prayers of each of his servants. God knows the best for his servants, as long as we want to be patient and pray that God will give you the best way for his servant. "My story is long on my daughter and unwittingly tears falling down my cheeks, and my daughter tried to remove my tears.

"I want to be like the father and mother" said daughter.
I can only smile.
"I remember the same promises he bun .." she said, crying back
"Man was indeed the wrong place, humans can only plan but only God who willed kid. For example, the mother of the same promise daughter, mother daughter promise to take away umra together with other families, but one day before we departed Umrah together suddenly the same mother at the first call of God, it is how? Mother to daughter promise can not be fulfilled, right? couse it already will of God son. God determines everything "

" mother said so anyway aaaaaaa mom" Tanya's daughter tearfully back.
"honey was the only instance only. At any time in the call of God we must be ready honey "I affirm
"Houses, never chance son, if he dating you, he'll come back and keep all its promises to you. But if Allah wills others, surely God will give you much better than that person. God is infinite justice, son. The good daughter attending college while patient focus and improve themselves daughter. Mother happy tablets now look more elegant daughter because the daughter is more often used the robe now and look more beautiful princess. "I said back.

"But bun, what if one's daughter's daughter have a greater sense of others?"
"No, son, but you have to remember there is still God's son, we as servants should be more affectionate and in love with God. Because only in Allah we ask and beg something son. And do not forget dear father and mother, "I replied.
"Yeah bun, daughter knows. Princess also really love your father and mother, no father and mother's daughter will not be able to live like this "he said.
"Then do not be sad daughter again yes, then mothers sad" I said back
"Yes mother, daughter sorry ... because of the daughter, the father and mother so confused and so worried. Princess appointment, the daughter will continue to pray to God and will keep the spirit for the sake of your father and mother. "She said as she hugged him tightly.


Every day I see he tried again smiled back as usual. Although sometimes I still see him often moody himself in his bedroom or dining table. But I'll keep trying to make it back into a princess as happy as usual. O Allah, help me to be a mother who is able to make her son did not grieve back and be my daughter who normally. Aamiin .........

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My move

My move

Every person must have a past. Either dark past or just the opposite. From each of the past that will surely leave a memory that means a lot to the owner of the experience. No exception for me.
Bitter sweetness of a life experience, makes me a woman who continues to learn from past mistakes. Getirnya life also gives clarity to me, that life must go on, although all must be originated from an error. Even sobs did not ever stop to always be there and accompany every thought of all the errors. Maybe if tears could speak, I'm sure he'll say that he was tired out and hatch in my face. Or maybe he would be angry because he was afraid that if he could no longer dripping and flowing falling down my cheek.
Every woman wants to look perfect and definitely want to have a perfect life anyway. Not infrequently a woman willing to do anything to have that perfection. I had one woman who wanted to have a perfect life. Because perfection is the one who made me into a figure of a woman who looks so happy without realizing that there is a God who is far more perfect than me. And a perfection that should I start with an error.
All human beings must have made a mistake, not even a few of those who feel sorry and hoped that mistake will not happen again. And I, just like they've done something wrong, do not! not only one, but a lot of mistakes I ever did.

I wonder what happened to me today. Lately I've always felt restless, always sad, sometimes angry, even I was not at peace with my life at this time. Arm-time I tried to calm down and pray, but I still can not find the answer to my anxiety nowadays. Till I met a woman wearing a khimar syar'i, and I feel cool when seeing her. Subhan Allah, praise be to Him.
The woman was named Tari, he's one of my new friends on campus. I learned a lot about the religion from him, he also saah one person who could made me realize the importance of hijab. Initially I asked him, why he used the hijab syar'i, what drives it used the hijab syar'i. And he simply replied "That's Commandments". Then he told me to open the Koran and menbaca surah Al-Araf verse 26 which means:
"O Children of Adam! Indeed, we have been providing clothing to cover your nakedness and for jewelry for you. However, piety clothes, that's better. Thus sebahagian God's signs, hopefully they remember. "(Al-Araf: 26)

Abu Hurayrah radi 'anhu said: "The Prophet sallallaahu' alaihi wa sallam said, which means:" There are two classes of hell I'd never seen before; a group of people who hold the whip like cattle used for whipping men and women who dressed but essentially naked, they walked swaying, their heads tilted like a camel's hump. They will not go to heaven and could not smell her. Indeed Jannah aroma wafted from the distance so and so. "(HR. Muslim)
                
                Many letters and traditions that he has shown on the instruction hijab, many things that I learned from dance, she also taught me about a woman who shaleha. This heart felt calm and happy to hear all the things that tell you about the woman shaleha Dance with me. I thought of this possible answer to my anxiety?, Maybe God told me to fix myself?. Some days I think about all of this, I kept asking about the hijab ngajiku teacher who recommended in God. And indeed convincing answers to heart that he was kept and close the genitals that Allah's command. And starting saai it was I myself intend to improve dri and use hijab which is as recommended by Allah SWT. Bismillah
                Gradually, the process for the sake of the process I started to transform myself into a woman to get closer to God and try to use hijab which is consistent with the recommendation of Allah SWT. Every day I feel more and more quiet time to get closer to God, and with the use of the veil was I had the coolness yourself. Day after day I continue to improve myself, look in the mirror and bermuhasabah themselves will all the same mistakes I did. And maybe this is the way God wants for me, and maybe it answers all the anxiety that I experienced.
                Change for the better does not mean there is no obstacle. There are so many obstacles, temptations even ejekkan that I get when I decided he was kept well. Many who support, not a few who mock and was surprised because this my change.
"Zaa ... why did you change? "
"Zaa ... you know why?"
"Zaa ... want ngaji where?"
"Zaa..pake tablecloth? wide hood that? "
"Zaa..jangan quasi-goody sok'an so ah, do not fit!"
"Zaa ... the wind's okay to be rich this?"
"Alizaa, lu tuh pantes not so rich, scamp scamp aja mah need not be self-righteous so .."
And many more questions and remarks that they give when they saw me turn into a better figure. I ask forgiveness from Allah the Almighty…

                Honestly, when I feel down I feel sad, why, when I want to change for the better but much to wag my change. Until finally I asked Dance "Dance, Dance decide what it used time much mocking bersyar'i Dance? Is that as bad as past me until they make fun of me? "I asked, while showing the face of sluggish," it is reasonable Ejekkan Aliza, maybe they're all confused as you turn out like this. You just need to give them a smile as they mock you. After all, you change it's because God so to what a shame .. let other people tell you about your past, now that you have to think about is your future. Let others comment on your past, the important thing is now you're already trying to improve yourself, and it is of God's love. So you do not need to worry "Dance Smile as he reassured me.
Dance also shows a sentence that:
"When you change with the teachings of God to bersyar'i, then you should be prepared to talked about by people, friends and even your parents though. But you need not fear, for God will avenge the rumors with wonderful plans for you. "

                Hear the explanation and encouragement Dance gave, I was stronger will be rumors of other oaring and increasingly continues confident this will be my change. I do not need to be afraid and should further strengthen my faith so as not to fall back ...

Prayer-ku
Oh God, I know I'm not perfect
I know, I'm a sinner ......
However, not door-thy mercy is greater for those who want to repent?
I beg Ya Allah
Give me the strength to keep istiqomah live my days in accordance Shari'ah-Mu Ya Allah
Because they only thee will I find self-perfection
To reach Syugra thy eternal and immutable ..
                
                I also just need mendo'a-kan they were indeed wag and make fun of me, hopefully they opened the door of his heart by God. And the more I sykuri, I had both parents who are fully supportive of what I do. While it is still within the rules and teachings of religion, he completely handed over to me on the road I choose. Even today many friends who support my change, that not a few of them were happy to see my change. Even among themselves had no intention to emigrate just like me. Aamiin Yes Rabbal'alaamiin, hopefully as soon as possible to emigrate to get better.
words,
Thank you O God, you strengthen yourself and this heart to be better emigrate. You make it easy path to understanding your guidance, and you give me those who are able to support each other and encourage each other to continue istiqomah ...

All this is because Allah SWT.

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HAN IN LOVE

HAN IN LOVE

I am Aliza, a child rantauan from neighboring Negri, by kesematan get a scholarship to study at one university in S1 Seol. Yaap, here I stay seoarang himself, even so I've had some friends who did the campus and even the majors with me. One of them named Kristall. I and Kristall is nearer and kebih get familiar, maybe because our apartment next door and Kristall is always helpful when I face difficulties, especially difficulties in interacting with the surrounding community. Living alone in a foreign country was initially very difficult, because life here is very much different from the life in my native country. Slowly but surely I'm trying to learn the habits-habits that do people of this city with the help of Kristall and her brother. Kristall live with his elder brother named taeyon, they both indeed genuine Seol, so I always ask for their help when experiencing difficulties and they will be happy to help.

This morning I was with Kristall plans to Hangang ditepian jogging round the park, or commonly known as the Han River. Around 6 am after early morning prayers I've been preparing for jogging. Arrived - arrived to the sound of the phone reads "Yeoboseyo? Oh ne ne ... ", it turns out the telephone from Kristall who was waiting in the front lobby appartement, then I rushed down to the lobby. When in the lobby I saw Kristaal together taeyon eonni will likely come with me and Kristall for jogging. "Annyeong eonni? Whoa turns eonni join too ...? ", I said cheerfully. "Liza Annyeong shii, ne ... I was bored in my room, so I want to join you, let all fresh too ...", replied eonni taeyon hugging me. It was not long we went straight to the park on the banks of the Han River. During jogging, endlessly they explain the story of the Han River, and they pointed out places what is good in the area of ​​the Han River. We stopped for a while on the edge of the Han River to enjoy the beautiful views of the Han River. Subhanallah Shocked to see the beautiful scenery of the river. "Liza? you like this place? ", asked Kristall me. "I love Ne ... Kristall, maybe this place will be a place favoriteku in Seol ..", I replied with happy. "When high school I often come here with my friends. Why do not we often come here too? You agree? ", asked Kristall spirit. "AAAA agree bangett Kristall ...", I replied with vigor, taking a small jump position.

When it is cool to talk with Kristall and taeyon eonni, suddenly heard a male voice call out the name of Kristall. "Well ... .Kristall ....", Shouted the man. Suddenly I Kritall look back and see who's calling Kristall with loud noise. It turned out that some of the men who are doing activities such as jogging us. "Yaa..Oppa. Jongging here too? ", Shouted Kristall behind. They all approached us who are sitting enjoying the beauty of the Han River. "Whoa there taeyon nuna too. Yes we again jogging-jogging handsome aja nih here. That's who? ", Asked the man at the Kristall while looking at me. "Ohyaa kenalin oppa, this new chingu Aliza I from neighboring countries", replied Kristall putting his arm around my shoulder. He extended his hand to me. Because I was not accustomed to shaking hands with a man, then I bowed my body while praising, "Joesonghamnida, Jonen Aliza imnida .." and all men bow. "Mianhae oppa, chingu this one so special can not be tricked," said Kristall continue. "Liza, it Chanyeol oppa he emang Like so SKSD people, but good anyway. Is wearing a black jacket that Kyungsoo oppa, his right hand was Luhan oppa, Sehun, Tao and Suho oppa. They are all my friends. ", Said Kristall explained to me. I just gave a smile on all of them.

Suddenly taeyon eonni which had been cool to listen to music, suddenly asking, "Loh Baekhyun shii where?", "That would join nuna, but he suddenly stomach pain so not participate deh nuna", obviously Sehun who had been look can not keep silent because of joking with the Tao. Either just me or does the fact, I saw Chanyeol oppa looked at me with terrible eyes. Somewhat uncomfortable heck yes diliatin new man in the know, but I think positive, maybe that Korean men look at her is like that. I'm also not too mikirin anyway. Then we all went on a jog together. Again I caught Chanyeol oppa glances, this time a real feel uncomfortable, I tried to shift towards taeyon eonni which indeed was cool to listen to music from the headset. "Wae ..?", Asked taeyon eonni me. "Anio eonni ..", I replied with a smile. When finished jogging, I was invited Kristall for breakfast together with the others, because my stomach had started growling, I did not reject the invitation Kristall.

Arriving dining place, somehow Chanyeol oppa choose seating that is right in front of me. "Hyung, hyung here here", shouted Sehun who told Chanyeol oppa to sit beside him, but there was no reply from Chanyeol oppa. Suddenly Kyungsoo oppa come without uttering any word and instantly pull ear Chanyeol oppa to move the seating position. "Aaaaa..appa..apaa ..." shouted Chanyeol oppa pain. Everyone laughed referred me, who saw the incident. Although the position of the seat has been moved, still Chanyeol oppa steal lirikkan me. The uncomfortable feeling lost and the feeling is excited "Aliza Duuuh please deh hell is use degdegan all ??", I said to myself. Kristall also order a meal for me, when he got the food arrived, the food ternyatan been booked Kristall me mixed up with food orders Chanyeol oppa, inevitably I had to table Chanyeol oppa to exchange food. "Mianhae oppa, it looks like our food to be confused?", I said to Chanyeol oppa. "MWO? Ohiya pantesan I am confused why this is dateng yaa .. ", replied Chanyeol oppa. "Gomawo .. 'oppa Chanyeol said again, smiling. I could only reply with a brief smile and straight back to my seat. When finished breakfast eaten we all returned to their respective homes.

During the day I spent time reading novels I have not had time I read because it was blocked by assignments are piling up. "Ting nong ..", the bell of the room appartementku. I rushed out, turned out to Kristall standing at the door with a plate of cake pink and green. "This is for you Lizaa", said Kritall while menodorkan plate at me. "Waaa, Gomawo. Who made this? "I asked. "Anio, this of Chanyeol oppa.", Replied Kristall. "Nugu?" I asked in surprise. "Ne, Chanyeol Oppa. Wae? ", Asked Kristall behind. "Anio anio .. Ayoo sign", I replied deny. "Liza yes ... Chanyeol oppa rich like deh with you?", Said Kristall astounding. I just quietly without answering a word. "Chanyeol oppa told me to deliver this cake for you. Ohiya he asked contact you, should not I love? "Continued Kristall. "For what?", I asked simply. "Maybe he's going communication with you. Chanyeol oppa was good, weve still keliatannya she likes not clear so strange, but it's really sweet Chanyeol oppa. She also likes the same nolong I eonni if ​​more trouble. Chanyeol oppa was also his friend namjachingu taeyon eonni. ", Said Kristall tried to explain. "Namjachingu taeyon eonni? Nugu? "I asked again. "Baekhyun oppa ..", replied Kristall. And I just found out that, man while jogging asked taeyon eonni is namjachingu her. And I decided not to give kontk on Chanyeol oppa, because I was scared and do not dare with new people I know.

The next day, I melakukkan college activities as usual. Leaving for college is always with Kristall, enter the class was always with Kristall, but if we go to the bathroom not ever together * yes yes lah *. When the course finished I decided to go to the library to find the presentation material next week. When it came to the library, I ran into a man who is no stranger dipenglihatanku. "Yes .. Aliza?", He asked, pointing at me. "Ne..Kyungsoo oppa?", "Yes, you remember dengaku?", He asked back. "How could I forget, interesting oppa oppa Chanyeol ears at breakfast hehe ..", I answered convincingly. Then we decided to look for a book together. "Liza, Chanyeol hyung contacted you?" Asked Kyungsoo oppa with a small voice, for fear of sounding a librarian. "Anio, wae oppa?" I asked back. "Yesterday he told me he likes with you at first sight, and she tries to ask your contact at Kristall.", He explained. It was true word Kristall, Chanyeol oppa likes me. Before I answer Kyungsoo oppa already mengajukkan question again "You gave your contact to Chanyeol?", "Anio oppa, I was refusing to not leave my contact at Chanyeol oppa." I said clearly. "Wae? Chanyeol it ... "," Sssssst ... ", the voice of the librarian who hung up Kyungsoo oppa because it was too loud and disturbing other visitors.

Then we decided to get out of the library and look for books that was already there. When exiting the library, I saw Kristall walking with a man. Yaaa man's height and stature was not foreign to me, it Chanyeol oppa. Suddenly the feeling came again, degdegan it arises again, I'm confused I panicked and almost salting moment. "Kyungsoo yaaa ...", shouted Chanyeol oppa. "Zaa zaa please please, do not be panic. Not until salting ", said in the liver. "Annyeong.", Said Chanyeol oppa me. "Kyungsoo oppa, teach me math please.", Said Kristall on Kyungsoo oppa. "Gaja's go to the library.", Spoke Kyungsoo oppa at Kristall. And finally they left us alone. The condition is most do not I love ya gini rich conditions, become very awkward. I just can not clear smiling because it is confused what to say. "To the cafeteria yuk", invite Chanyeol oppa. Again I can not say anything, I just nodded his head and walked toward the cafeteria. Up in the cafeteria Chanyeol oppa tried to start a conversation with me "Mianhae, if I am bothering you ..", "Anio anio oppa", I said the words Chanyeol decided oppa. Sangking geroginya instead decided the conversation of people. Yapp we finally get a casual chat because Chanyeol oppa who make the atmosphere look awkward. And in the end I was on my contact members Chanyeol oppa. Had beripikir, why here I look slut gives all contacts on others.

Night looks phone rang, and it turns out Chanyeol oppa send me a message. I think Chanyeol oppa same as other men in general were just lip service when sending a message to ask What are you doing?, Has been eating? have taken a bath ? and another question which is indeed a question that is usually the way down to small children. I and Chanyeol oppa continue the conversation we were talking about the time in the campus cafeteria. Chanyeol oppa asking me things, from why take courses in Seol? then what is the motivation lecture here, what the vision and mission of life that I live, and so forth. Even from these talks we can exchange opinions and information. Information about Seol and Jakarta.

Increasingly, the same relationship Chanyeol oppa I'm getting better. Chanyeol oppa also often helped me a lot, things such as chores campus. I and Kristall too often do things with Chanyeol oppa and his friends. Until the end Kristall ask that Sama did not cross my mind "Zaa, so you've invented at Chanyeol oppa?" "Huh? offcourse no, we just temenan. "I laughed. "Still? Chanyeol oppa never said to me he likes with you, he is also the story to a friend's apartment. "Kristall asked seriously. "Ayooo zaa replied ...", forced Kristall curious because I ignore the question. "Later aja yaa chingu, I'm confused," I said hurriedly left limp and Kristall.

Kristall question was a matter of thinking, "What really Chanyeol oppa likes me? or merely like instead? What diliat I try?. Where possible the hell, man as cool as it was like the same girl I rantauan this kind. What's great about me? feelings of ordinary aja deh. Ehh but why I was thinking about it? What lest I liked too? Aaa .... Aliza Aliza please stop stop, do not dream continues .. ", I said to herself as she smacked my forehead. Shortly after tepok forehead, my cell phone rang, and it was a message from Chanyeol oppa that says "Saranghyeo, I'm waiting for you in the back garden appartement". Degdegan liver, it would fall off, this mean anything? This dream is not it? one clay rich eye nih min aaaa ... want to ride again. it feels not believe this at all. "Dateng gak yaa, dateng gak yaaa? If dateng sign me real love too but the purpose here that college is not looking for a mate, if not dateng but weve the like. Duuh should be how is this? ", I said fussy. "Chingu yaaaa, wae ...? Keliatannya really confused ... ", asked Kristall surprising. Without saying a word I immediately shows the message sent to the Kristall Chanyeol oppa "I knew it right, already there to the park, definitely Chanyeol oppa already waiting for you.", Said Kristall spirit. "Kristall, you know I'm here for what purpose? I come here to study, not to find a mate. I just do not want will actually let my father and mother. I do not want Kristall. ", I replied wearily. "Well chingu, I know you college destination. But you tetep not be able to fool your heart. When you're dealing with Chanyeol oppa, you can still focus on college right? Chanyeol oppa also always help you, right? I'm sure liza, Chanyeol oppa will always lead you along. ", Cajoled Kristall assured.

There's nothing more I can say at Kristall, I just shut up and answer it with a smile. Until now, even I was confused as to what I should do. Keep it coming or avoidance. Remembering is also a message his father and mother who told me to focus on my goals for college. But I also can not lie in myself if I did save that feeling too. The more confused as to what should behave. But in the end I have to make decisions. And I decided not to come and go to the banks of the Han River to calm the mind. Who knows how many hours I sat on the edge of the Han River while listening to music-music mellow, suddenly someone give me a glass of bubble tea. When I saw that this person is Chanyeol oppa. At that moment I was confused and super duper wonder why Chanyeol oppa can know I'm here, why the hell would I come here nyamperin Chanyeol oppa. "Oppa? Mianhae .... ", Ucpaku. "Gwenchana, I already know all", he said with a smile. "Kristall? Oppa, I know also from Kristall here? "I asked curiously. "Ne ... Kristall story all to me. I'm waiting for you in the garden, but you did not show-up. I sent you a message not bales, I call myself did not you take up. So I decided to ask to Kristall. And finally Kristall explained to me. "And he said, explaining. Again, there is nothing I can not, I just quietly staring at the water flowing in the river Han.

Suddenly Chanyeol oppa issued a bunch of white roses from her hand and say "I've known all, you also can not bohongin you feel. I will try to be the best for you. I'll try to guided you. And I promise not to disrupt the activities of your college. We both support each other and accompany. Want you to always be there for me? ", He asked seriously. Confused, very confused, it felt like shouting "Bundaaa thy mother upset ...". Slowly I'm designing a word properly in order not to slaah speak. "Mianhae oppa, I can not promise always there for oppa, but I'll try to be there when any circumstances.", I replied with a small smile. "So you want?", He asked, surprised. "We run it once wrote oppa, in the future too we do not know our mate or engga. All that has been ruled by God, our lives are run and pray. For father and mother, I will try to say to him but not in a fast time. ", I explained. Chanyeol oppa only reply with a happy smile radiated from her face. "Do not forget kenalin me to yaaaa father and your mother", he said further. I just reply with a nod and a smile. This is where we will start a new story together, with the witness trees, the wind, and the flow of water from the Han River this.

Alhamdulillah getting our day in a relationship with good, even our relationship was finally disetuji mother, because I've mentioned this to the mother. Mother was advised:
"Mother would not ngelarang you have a special friend. Mother just the message, stay focused on your goals and keeping your distance with friends special it. You are a woman, son, you shall live alone there. Take care of yourself. Father and Mother always pray for you from here. Mother dear Aliza "
Finally Chanyeol oppa was already familiar with his father and mother, because we had skype'an together. I also will be introduced to parents Chanyeol oppa. Yaaap, the Han River will remain a favorite place both of us. If indeed we mate, maybe this place will be a place that will always be our visit during our lives. But if we are not paired, we will remain friends and will always come to this place to remember the times we shared.

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Scrumptious Thanksgiving Arrive in Your place

Scrumptious Thanksgiving Arrive in Your place

Assalamu’alaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh.

Waaah already a long time I did not bercuap yaa-cuap this place, already a lot of the same dust cobwebs ya, must be in the same broom clear dip el * ga *
Ya want a little to make a story, about an unexpected experience "), may yaaa, yuk aah start aja not let the longer

Either should be happy or sad should I feel when I actually arrived and stepped on Arab land that time. Happy as I can go run the pilgrimage with mom and my sister. Sad because the father does not participate with us, but I believe, the father must know and clay that we can finally run a pilgrimage that had been planned by the father before.

Yaaa ... pilgrimage is indeed worship previously planned. Are you hoping to invite his wife and two children to perform pilgrimage together, although I was not aware of the plan earlier. But alas, the father of the current circumstances it is very supportive, heart disease father of recurrence and should frequently check up to the hospital and could not be separated from the supervision of a physician. Doctors also do not allow the father to too many activities, because they can lead to heart disease father recurrence.

Up to the date of May 23, 2015 the father breathed his last. Honestly day it was truly a day that makes me feel very devastated devastated. I can not accept the current situation, I do not want to be left father, I was not ready. I'm disappointed, annoyed, angry, why God so quickly called the father, why God did not give a long time for the father. I can not be happy father, I could not give anything to you, I have not been able to make a father proud to have a son like me. I was devastated, saw father lying in front of my eyes. There's nothing I can do but cry. But I realized, I care about you, but God is much the same dear father. I realize that God does not want you continue to feel sick.

Exactly at 12.30 the night in the local area (Jeddah) I and other Umrah pilgrims arriving at King Abdul Aziz airport. Then we continue the journey to Medina in the travel for 4 hours of Jeddah. During my trip I was amazed by the views of the desert and mountain rocks on the right and left of the road. Allah akbar, God is great. So great was the power of Mu Ya Allah.

Congratulations on the road, on the right and left of the road filled with mountain rocks

On arrival in Medina the more my heart pounding, tears fell so heavy. There are no words that I speak but words thankful because I was given the opportunity to come in and arrive at this place. Yaaa Masjiid Nabawi, where this place is located inside the mosque of the Prophet ate of the Muslims, the Prophet of the end times of the Prophet Muhammad S.A.W

In this mosque I met with all the Muslims from various countries of Turkey, Palestine, India, Egypt, Malaysia, Singapore, Brazil and many others. Masjid Nabawi in my experience the unexpected events, starting often greeted by people in the Prophet's Mosque, given drinking water, given the date until there were hugging and kissing my cheek (woman why women). Subhanallah really wonderful, loving Muslims: ")

Until one afternoon before the noon prayer, two (2) people pretty white woman came up to me and other Umrah pilgrims entourage who was sitting waiting for a noon, and then he said

"Assalamu'alaikum, can speak English?"

without doubt the sudden affection answered "Yes" with a smiling face.

Then the woman asked again "From Indonesia right?"

"Of course" I replied.

With a face full of happy two women told him that she wanted to take pictures with my bersana mothers and other worshipers. 2 This woman came from Palestine, two women said that yes, happy and liked by the people of Indonesia, he said that the Indonesian people well, polite and willing to help, always helping State. Therefore two women wanted a photo with us (me and my mothers other worshipers of travel that I follow), after the two women hugged me kissing my cheek. Honestly who knows what happened to me, then I feel happy and bahagis be met by two women, all the more so they say that they like and are happy with the people of Indonesia. But unfortunately, I did not ask who the two of them and I did not capture the moment on camera that I L

After 3 days in the Medina me, mama, mas dani and other worshipers traveled to the city of Mecca, but prior to the city of Mecca, we all conduct mikot before Umrah in the mosque beer ali, after it had kama proceeded to Masjid forbidden in city Mecca , Approximately 5 hours we traveled there (interspersed with breaks).

Arriving in the city of Mecca, the atmosphere is a little different, the wind that blows feels tight because it Madinah and Makkah is currently experiencing winter, but cold in Makkah colder than in the medina. I and other worshipers first break at the hotel until the wait time tawaf. Promptly at 1 me and pilgrims continue the worship tawaf and headed into the Haram. When entering the mosque, my heart was pounding, plus when he saw the temple as the crow flies, the pounding of my heart. Incessantly I express gratitude and reciting Talbiyah, Subhan Allah O Allah I still do not believe I could come here, I can see the temple in person and up close (as it usually see the temple of the picture, can now be viewed directly) , Dear Allah....

Honestly when he saw the temple and during tawaf in my mind is just Dad, I miss you, I want to meet with the father. Tears flowed ceaselessly into my cheeks, while I give a little sob Talbiyah sentence. All the people around me (pilgrims travel) including mama, can only be stroked my shoulder, trying to help stop the cry that seemed to weep from my lips.

Completed tawaf, a lot of prayer that I prayed, I knew an opportunity like this is very difficult to get, I have to take advantage of this opportunity to continue and many pray and give gratitude for what God has given them.

The longer, more flowing tears, only father I remember it
"Father, ade miss the same father. Ade, same mama mas has come here, sir, we got here safely pack. Father wants us all present here together pack, the father who wants us to worship together. Mr. ade dear father, father missed ade, ade want to see the father. "

"Ya Allah Ya Rahman Ya Rahim, only Thee I begged and asked, terpatkan my father disisimi, beside the best and most beautiful in Jannah thy God, Protect and keep you there, 'God, take away the father of the heat of the fire of Hell Ya Allah, give father happiness there. As well as give me the strength and the strength to deal with all the God, and give me always facilities, and Kelancaraan alive so I can be happy mama and my brother, beriaku health so that I was able to keep mom and my sister Ya Allah "

Increasingly heavy tears fell down her cheeks.
Yaaa maybe it was a handful of prayer that I could say much more * *
* First stop crying yaa-nangisnya, the nyesek fear can not breath # deritapenyakitkecil *

After completing the tawaf, later followed by sa'i (safa hill to the road of dignity for men trot) and tahalul (haircuts). Completed the major pilgrimage (to myself) my mama and mas dani resume worship in front of the temple while waiting for the dawn of time, because already menunjjukkan local time at 04.00 am.

Although the hours of 04.00 am, here never know the word quiet, always busy, always solid. Many of them are still conducting worship tawaf or just pray, dhikr or read the Qur'an in front of the altar near the temple.

Ohiya if in Arabic (Madinah and Makkah) there are two times the azan. Adhan first call to prayer beads and tahajud, second azan (interval 1 jam'an) the call to prayer for dawn prayers. The distance between the adhan and ikomat was about 30 minutes late. Deh stand there, worship tuh feel at peace, and feel constantly reminded. And I tuh most like to sit near the temple, do not want to move it feels.

After morning prayers, my mama and mas dani not directly move from our prayers. We always silent while dhikr and reading the Qur'an. When these eyes darting * what is * see here and there, suddenly these eyes fixed on the sky above the temple. Subhan Allah, Allahu Akbar ..... I have never seen such a beautiful sky, the sky pink and blue, plus the moon is white, yaaa I love the moon, unrelenting I give thanks to God, bernar -Right favor of God given so beautiful.

I am the type of person who like to capture certain moments, so views of the beautiful sky that I will not waste it. Because I know, moments like that I have rarely encountered. And this appearance dawn sky above the temple

And many-monet monet that makes me feel amazed: ")

Duuh from earlier story actually real length netesin basic maudlin tears * *
Sorry yaa, the pemblog weve whiny hehe: "")

Furthermore, my little story of the places that I visited there pas: ")
Under yaaaa ...

Foto Masjid Kuba in Madinah

 Foto in Masjid Nabawi at Madinah

Morning near the Ka'bah, while dhuha'an

This intention mama photo from the side, instead eeh keambil head wrote, because suananya really crowded here: ")

Duhhh rich by now aja yaa stories .. already were mostly ...

Actually there are many more photos, but the scared nyampah hehe: ")

This story does not intend to show off, just want to share their stories to the blogger wrote. And hopefully make that has not been here to here, and who have been here can be here again. Aamiin Allahumma'aamiin: ")

NB: The photos in share an original photo that I took from my smartphone, do not believe? No evidence Disaya and can ask to me J

Thank blogger ......

Wassalamualaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh

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Cerpen ☺, Ngesahre ☺,

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